Chapter 649
Magic and machinery.
Compared to the conveniences of the modern world—where every invention made life easier—Murim was a miserable place to live.
The so-called “roads” were natural, unpaved paths that shattered your spine and hips just by sitting in a carriage.
Smartphones and Wi-Fi were dreams from another dimension, and electricity didn’t exist.
Well, there ‘was’ one way to make electricity—by getting struck by lightning. But since you had to trade your life for it, the cost-effectiveness wasn’t great.
Still, life went on.
Or rather, life was so fragile that you didn’t even have time to complain.
Even after all that, things weren’t so bad.
As a certain “Y” once said, food, clothing, and shelter were the three essentials of human life—and as the Third Young Master of the Taewon Jin Clan, I was doing pretty well for myself.
‘Except for one thing.’
I looked seriously at the young servant from the inner palace. The boy couldn’t have been older than a middle-schooler.
“Let me ask you one thing. Think carefully before you answer.”
“Y-Yes, sir?”
“Are you looking down on me because I’m Han?”
The boy widened his eyes and shook his head frantically.
“N-no, of course not! How could I ever—”
“Then why did you bring me to this cesspool? I specifically told you to take me to the latrine.”
“B-but… this ‘is’ the latrine, sir.”
“I told you to think carefully before answering. Lie again, and I’ll fill your house with dung. Ever heard of a sect called the Beggar’s Union?”
“Yes? Oh, yes! The one made up of beggars, right?”
“Good, you know them. With a single word from me, I can bring thousands—well, maybe a hundred—of those beggars here. Especially a guy named Gong Gibang. The stench off that one is legendary. They’ll turn you and your nine generations into a living cesspit. Now take me to a ‘real’ latrine!”
Startled by my outburst, the boy’s eyes welled up.
“I-I’m so sorry! Truly sorry, sir! But this really is the cleanest one we have!”
Damn it.
So this ‘was’ the latrine.
Reality hit hard enough to make my vision darken. Even the Central Plains weren’t this bad.
“These savages…”
“Pardon?”
“Nothing. You’re dismissed.”
After sending the poor kid away, I stared grimly at the cramped, foul-smelling space before me and stepped inside cautiously.
‘Creak.’
The wooden board beneath me groaned. Closing the door felt like sealing myself inside a one-man gas chamber.
I muttered with a stony face,
“Could this be a trap set by Baek Sang?”
I’d read enough martial arts novels to know the trope—some top master assassinated in a toilet.
But when I peeked between the planks, even that suspicion vanished. No matter how dedicated a killer might be, no one would hide ‘here.’
‘Please, God. Buddha. Jesus. Anyone.’
Every second felt like a year as I held my breath and went about my business.
Then—
‘Whish! Thunk!’
It all happened in an instant.
Reacting instinctively, I caught something midair. It had torn through the rotted door with a sharp, slicing sound.
An arrow?
The moment I recognized it, I moved like lightning.
‘Crash!’
The door shattered, and the cool night air rushed in—but that was all.
No one was around. Only the distant cheers and music of the ongoing banquet.
Still—
‘South-east.’
With my level of skill, tracing the arrow’s direction wasn’t difficult. Without hesitation, I kicked off the ground.
‘Boom! Swoosh!’
The wind whipped past me as I leaped from wall to wall, landing atop the highest pavilion.
From there, the entire inner palace stretched below me—
Torches glowing, revelers in the training hall, guards stationed everywhere.
‘Who could it be?’
Even for someone at my level, there were limits.
The palace grounds were huge, and the number of people moving about was far greater than usual.
To make things worse, the guards of the Beast Palace were particularly zealous about their duties.
“Southwest! On the rooftop!”
“Who goes there?!”
‘Fweeeet!’
The sharp sound of horns blared as the guards swarmed like ants.
And even before they arrived, something else did.
‘Whizz! Boom!’
‘Ah, damn. This is getting messy.’
As I stared at the arrows and spears that embedded themselves near my feet, I glanced down at the arrow I was still holding.
At a glance, it looked identical to the others—same size, same make.
But there was one key difference I’d missed.
‘This…’
A small bundle of leather was tied to the fletching.
And just as I realized it, dozens of torches flared to life below the pavilion.
“You’re surrounded!”
“Identify yourself and surrender immediately!”
Perfect timing.
After a brief pause, I made my decision and silently muttered,
‘Open Inventory. Store item.’
‘Ding!’
With the familiar system chime, the arrow in my hand vanished into thin air.
The guards, unable to see clearly in the dark, shouted again.
“This is your final warning! Disarm yourself and surrender!”
“Raise your hands above your head, or we’ll put an arrow through your skull!”
‘Damn, these guys sound like local law enforcement.’
With a resigned sigh, I raised my hands.
Once they recognized me, it would all be cleared up. A few words of explanation and it’d be over.
No need to escalate things any further—
But why were their faces like that?
‘Why do they look like they’ve just seen a ghost?’
And then, I realized.
‘Whooosh.’
A breeze swept past.
My lower half felt… unusually breezy.
‘Fwoosh!’
“Ah—ahhh!”
“Huh…?”
Dozens of torches lit up, spotlighting me from every angle.
As the guards gawked and muttered in awe, one thought ran through my head.
‘…I’m screwed.’
I’d forgotten to pull my pants up.
—
“I’m asking out of genuine curiosity,” Nam Ho said calmly, about half an hour later.
“You’re Dark Heaven, aren’t you?”
“Excuse me?”
“You must be. What else would explain it? The head of a Murim Alliance branch comes all the way to the Southern Barbarian Region, punches a tribe chief in the chest, climbs a roof under the moonlight, and flashes his junk. You’re trying to destroy the alliance from within, right? Am I wrong?”
Across the table, Taesan—busy chewing something—raised his hand.
“Nam Ho, what’s Dark Heaven?”
Nam Ho stared at him silently for a moment, then turned to Sama Pyo.
“I’m asking sincerely. What’s the best way to shut this idiot’s mouth permanently?”
“…”
After a moment’s thought, Sama Pyo stood up.
“I’ll bring more food.”
“Good idea. But as an agent of the Shadow Pavilion, let me suggest something better—
Forget bringing the food. Just throw ‘him’ at it. If I hear one more word, I’ll lose my mind.”
Nam Ho was already an irritable man, but today he was downright explosive.
Even Taesan, normally oblivious, looked terrified and apologized.
“Taesan… did wrong…”
After glaring daggers at Taesan, Nam Ho took a deep breath.
I knew it was my turn and spoke first.
“There’s… been a misunderstanding.”
“A misunderstanding? What kind of dogshit misunderstanding?”
“No, seriously, let me expl—”
“I heard it all! People saw it! Over two hundred witnesses! Is ‘that’ why you sent Lady Ju away? Is that your thing?!”
“Wow. Good thing she’s not here, huh? Could’ve been bad.”
“You son of a—!”
‘Crash!’
The old man—over eighty years old—smashed the solid table with one hand.
I barely managed to suppress the urge to applaud.
If I pushed him any further, he’d die of rage.
“Master Nam, please. Calm down.”
“Huuh… huuuh…”
“Deep breaths. In and out. Good. That’s it.”
Sama Pyo, looking uncharacteristically gentle for a demonic cultivator, soothed him before turning to me.
“Anyway, Captain, what you said—is that true?”
“Yes, but there’s some context—just a tiny misunderstanding—”
“Did you really send Lady Ju to handle things for ‘this’?”
“I swear to god, how did things turn into this? My title’s gonna change to the ‘Naked Dragon’ at this rate.”
Groaning at the ceiling, I finally spoke.
“That’s not it. I was attacked.”
“What?”
“Attacked?”
“Taesan knows what attack is.”
All three turned to me instantly.
“When? Where?” Nam Ho demanded.
“In the latrine. I was, uh, doing my business when an arrow came through the door. I ran out to find the shooter and… well, that’s when it happened. I didn’t have time to, uh, fix my pants.”
“Then did you catch the assassin?”
“Would I be sitting here if I had? They shot from afar, and with so many people in the inner palace, I couldn’t find them.”
It would’ve been easier if it were a dagger or poison needle—those had shorter range. But an arrow? A long-range weapon like that could’ve come from anywhere.
“Then why didn’t you report it immediately? If you had, the palace lord could’ve ordered a search.”
Fair point. I had considered it.
Being mistaken for a flasher was humiliating, but still better than causing panic over an unknown assassin.
But—
“It was an attack, but not quite an attack.”
“What?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Taesan confused. Attack not attack? Explain.”
“Please die,” Nam Ho muttered.
After silencing Taesan, he frowned.
“Not an attack?”
“Yes.”
“There’s something you’re hiding. Speak clearly.”
“I didn’t realize it at first, but there was something strange about the arrow.”
Spreading my senses to confirm no one else was nearby, I muttered quietly,
‘Open Inventory. Summon.’
‘Ding.’
With the familiar sound, something solid appeared in my hand.
I withdrew it from my robe naturally and set it on the table—a single arrow, along with the small leather pouch tied to its fletching.
I untied it, and a small, rolled-up piece of hide unfurled across the table.
It was no bigger than a child’s palm. On it, written in fine, neat letters:
– “Today. At the hour of the tiger. West Gate.”
It was a message scroll.
An invitation from someone unknown.